Tough people
John Eldredge said "Be kind to every single person you encounter because every one you come in contact with is under some kind of attack."

It is a good point. We so often think, "What does he have against me? Why is he being such a jerk?" When we have no idea what battles he struggling with. We all struggle. Each of us has a wound (some have more than one) that has haunted us our entire life. Each of us carries around a chain of bondage to some person we struggle with or some past mistake we can't seem to shake.

Haunting - but true.

My brother in law attends a dynamic church in Birmingham and he had this posted from his church on his refrigerator. It ties in with this theme:

Seven words of Passion
1) Forgive everyone who is trying to ruin your life.
2) Help others who are experiencing your same struggle.
3) Be sure you've taken care of those near you.
4) Aim your hard questions at God, not man.
5) Be human enough to acknowledge your need.
6) Be assured, there is a purpose and there is an end.
7) Finally, surrender your life to God and let it go.

I struggle a great deal with a broken relationship. I can't seem to let it go but I have to. I cannot reconcile with the other party because the other party doesn't want to reconcile with me. God doesn't command reconciliation - He commands forgiveness. I need to forgive them so I can move on and they need to forgive me so they can move on. While I can't do anything about their forgiveness of me -- I can forgive them.

These seven words of passion help me in this struggle. When I think they are trying to ruin my life (they aren't - that is the enemy), I just need to forgive them.

When I run into others who struggle with this same issue, I need to open up and share my struggle so that I might be able to help them with the same issue.

I need to focus my attention not on them but rather on those closest to me and to be sure I am taking care of them. We waste so much time worrying about those that truly don't care about us that we ignore those around us who love us and need our attention. To spend time fretting about the struggle, talking about it, worrying about just gives more and more power to it. The enemy loves this. He wants us to wallow in it and to stay trapped in bondage. He hates forgiveness because that takes him out of the equation entirely.

When the tough times resurface, I need to aim my tough questions at God not the person I am struggling with. I'm not going to resolve anything by backing the other party into the corner with my well-articulated summary of the battle. I need to spend my time talking to God and giving Him the hard questions. He can deal with it.

I need to be human enough to acknowledge my need. I need this person. I need a relationship with them. It is OK to admit that I need it and that it hurts that we can't have a relationship.

I need to rest on the assurance that in all things, God has a purpose and I can focus on the end. There is an end to this in Glory. One day, the pain and suffering of broken relationships will end.

Lastly, I need to surrender to God. Quit fighting, quit keeping score and quit looking for yet another snub. Let it go. Quit giving power to it. Give it all over to God. Let the Healer heal it.

Soar!